I still live at home for medical reasons. Can I take care of my self Do not know. Why leave when you have most things provided. I do cut the grass and do a lot of the heaven lifting as well when they ask me. If you do not have a medical reason to get a job by all means try to get a job. Would love to be able to be normal. The most normal I have is writing this. I have found I like to write. I just do not have the patents or focus to stay on one topic instead of dozens. Yep, that way losing focus the last few sentences. People say you look fine get a job. Yeah getting a job for anyone is hard. But when you factor in Autism, ADD, Depression, Anxiety, and OCD. It can be down right impossible especially when You act not so normal. And then their is anger problem that really acts up when I am too stressed or too much change happens too fast. If I am angry I need to leave if I can’t I tend to explode. I do not want to hit anyone so keep to as small events as possible. This means many, many lonely nights. And then you factor in I came out gay as well. Plus A firm believer in Christ. Autism + Christian + Autism and other problems + gay = A very bad combination.
This Is the true me. I’m Christian and will to die just because of it. I’m Part jewish This were the double blessing comes from. I’m pro-life Abortion is wrong Nothing more to say. I’m a hard core gamer But Suck at most games. I don’t like blood and gory games Now zombie games are just stupid. I’m a social media Networker. I have moved to the internet to try to solves problem I have in real life, they never did get fixed. I can help many people with allt eh skills I have but can’t because I don’t know how to ask people without blowing up. I DO HAVE A ANGER PROBLEM, SO i RUN AWAY FROM EVERYTHING LITERALLY IN REAL LIFE. Most of the time I get made because I think people don’t listen to me or interpret my actions wrong. In most cases, they do. But other times they don’t. I have been wanting to do many thingS but to scared to ask to do it. At times I think some classes are stupid. I don’t need them. I have trouble taking notes. I stopped going to class and school. And also quite going to church over this and a few other things as well. I feel like most don’t understand me. I’m smarter than most. My heart is well I love to help people but most of the time,But not through my words, it is through my hands. I could care less about money. I talk about Civil War all the time because I want these names I have to just go away. I have thought of selling my soul over the years. That option has always been on the table. I’m broken like everyone else. But with all I have gone through and everything I have done. I know God has always been there Protecting me and others who are strong but there times have not come yet. I will fully awaken some day. I don’t know when or if. But I do know one thing I have a give to bring light to those who are hurting and out case as myself. Just by them being close to me, some people have said ” I can’t point my finger on it but you are not like other people I have talked to” I look at people hearts. Before I would have to be close To them now I can tell even through the computer. That is the power of God for you. Most people have their gifts my gift is from the heart. Not even doing things for people its a spiritual ones. That is my true gift. People will tell me things but they don’t know why they have told me they just feel like they can trust me. That is one of the strongest gifts of God. The gift of the heart of God. I look at people hearts into what they have done in the past. But what there heart is. Most people will never how to only those who have been through alot of trials. Satin is scared of all those who have this gift. We Can heal, and cast out spirits of all types. That is a gift of the heart. when you know what is pledging them. We are the most persecuted in the world too. We have many problems most are homeless, have psychological problems, physical ailments, Can’t speak, God has created these to show you the power of god. I relate to these people. When you bully people who have disabilities I get angry I was bullied a lot when I was younger. Sometimes I think help is bullying at times. Also I have the heart to help all people, especially those who have Autism the thing that plagues me the most of anything, even at church.
- Adult Bullies (recoveringanorexic.wordpress.com)